Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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