i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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