When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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