where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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