please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
