no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
