is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Randomize
