Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
