I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
