Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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