Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
