Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Randomize
