He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
