I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
