that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
