smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
