Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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