And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
