This girl is more easily done than said...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
