Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
