you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
