is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
