marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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