Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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