Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
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