I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
