But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Randomize
