Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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