Your mouth is God's brothel.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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