hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
