what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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