Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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