I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
