just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
