I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
