I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
