Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
