He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
wow bdsm is so cute
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
