Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
how do flat chested girls get laid?
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Randomize
