at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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