We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
operation have a gay friend backfired
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Randomize
