hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize