you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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