i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize