lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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