What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize