She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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