Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
