You really coming over, don't trick.
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Randomize
