How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Operation Purity has been aborted
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Dear god my vagina.
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