haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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